That's why Kanye is a gay fish.
Just so you know, the bottle of red gatorade is NOT GATORADE. It is definitely someone's puke. I hope nobody else makes the same mistake I did.
i just put all of my beerlympics medals into my academic awards box. i would say they are my greatest achievement since college.
Woke up with string cheese braided into my hair- literally braided
He was eating her out on the elevator. What a good man.
Or they can chase TEQUILA shots with it. I don't know why my phone capitalizes TEQUILA.
All that matters is I got the megaphone home safely
Easy Mac is falling out of my sweatshirt as I'm walking down the street.
Well apparently I'm no fun since I won't have a threesome with him and my mother.
Would it be weird to jack off in the hospital?
I'm having post-experience "why didn't I fuck her in a public bathroom" regrets
You kept purposefully giving me wrong directions, laughing, then yelling at me for taking directions from a drunk person.
I just want a boyfriend who will have sex to Disney Pandora.
its 8 and I'm HUNGOVER!! how is that possible??
That man makes my giblets tingle
Congrats? I think?
Randomize
