Just found out I have to work new year's eve. It's like one final 'fuck you' from 2009.
We are probably going to have to use your boobs as currency to get this done
if it doesnt flame it aint got game is a bad drinking motto eyebrow-wise.
eyebrows regrow, your balls dont
His ass WILL be my cock's next vacation home.
I wish I had a dick so I could say shit like that.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think its awesome that i just got you to cheer for sex
Well sex is awesome. Sex deserves cheers.
That was the night you tried to convince me you threw up your sould because your throwup was black
They put me in room 420 every time and I take bubble baths and smoke in the room and they bring food TO MY BED
BRING THE BAGELS
im mad at you for telling me he ejaculated during "let it go." Thanks for ruining the song forever.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The comfort of this onesie is keeping me single
He fed me jello shota while i was sitting on the toilet and then he peed in the shower
Literally I can feel my heart beat in my vagina because of how sore I am
For a guy who came before his dick was out of his pants, he gave surprisingly good head.
Apparently I made a chicken patty, angrily took it out of the microwave, walked outside, and threw it over the balcony. #me
We're getting a bucket of chicken and screwing around, so no, you can't join us.
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