This girls' body was nothing short of spectacular...her face, was like the '09 Detroit Lions
The bridesmaids just went smackdown on the floor, over the bouquet. I saw nipple. Best wedding ever
Make sure you take the apple pie out of your pocket before you pass out.
When a chinchilla decides to sit on your face while you're getting head from its owner, you bond.
My phone broke again .... im not really sure how im going 2 explain the teeth marks to the ppl at the Verizon store
No one likes a giant penis on their phone screen. I mean cmon. I'm a lady.
She just took a mirror selfie at the hospital while in labor.
You have better ratings than Crest. Only 4/5 dentists recommend it. You have 8/9 recommendation for your blowjob skills.
Don't shower too much, need the shame to be fresh to get the best story
when in doubt, mount your coworker in the staff room.
How was the party
I came home with only one shoe, a t shirt tied around my shoeless foot and I was covered in motor oil. Oh and my shorts were inside out. So you tell me
CyberMonday=Bulk Condom Shopping For 2018
Honestly no idea how dad figured out i did all that gay porn unless he was looking at gay porn.
can you bring the lube to algebra tomorrow
You did an excessive amount of blow and then screamed "WHO THE FUCK NEEDS A LADDER?!" And then Mario style wall-jumped onto the roof. It was one of the most impressive things I've ever seen.
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