my drunken desire to be gossip girl continues to ruin friendships for me
Day two of vacation and my first drink of the day is a plan b colada
Clearly, I'm already going to hell, so there's no point in trying anymore.
I woke up locked in the bar...this has redefined partying.
Horrible. I told her my girlfriend is in the hospital and she tried to give me a lapdance.
and lets be real... who can blow a middle school class's sunday school teacher and keep a straight face ever again? NOBODY.
At what point do you think my baptist preacher of a father will clue in that my brother "bringing a foreign exchange student" for thanksgiving means "bringing his european boyfriend and they'll probably fuck every night" for thanksgiving?
I emailed the police apartment to apologize to the officer from last night. I practically threw a hissy fit because he wouldn't hug me.
It was "against protocol"
...is this motivational speaking, or sexting? It's getting hard to tell.
Okay so the couple who keep propositioning people for threeways are def siblings not bf/gf
So are you gonna do it or no you said they're hot
it was an ACCIDENT
it was a DICK
I'm only gonna ask u this once. Y is there a picture of u only in superman underwear rubbin ur nipple on facebook????
Uh I can actually explain that one..
Nothing like casual arson to brighten your day
Can you get an STD by sharing underwear? Walk of shamed home and realized I was wearing someone else’s panties
No one knows. This doesn’t happen to normal people.
If it were up to me his wife would never get his penis again, but I guess they have some sort of arrangement
Yes, an arrangement called marriage
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