At a stoplight watching a woman push groceries in a stroller while dodging oncoming traffic... Reallllly Detroit?
So I had sex with him again. He's still got it. Not chlamydia, he got rid of that.
whatcha mean you cant get rid of genital warts? thats not what my girlfriend says
you wouldnt answer to anything but devil's advocate all night.
There are many reasons why he shouldn't come over. And each one is longer than his penis.
I just saw the list where the U.S. doesn't even rank in the top 10 in drinking countries. I know its Tuesday but....its for America
I CAME AT YOU WITH RAW FEELING
you grabbed my dick through my pants and hissed at me.
Since he's sober and out of jail, he acts like we are the worst people on Earth. Fuck him, the only acceptable time in life to do coke is the early twenties. He won't take that from us.
He was just lying on the living room floor watching Star Wars with six empty pack of cigarettes and two empty cases of beer.
In his defence I guess I did take the bed, couch and dining room set in the breakup.
Can't you just imagine you've grudge fucked me so we can get past this?
We were coming but I found wine on my way out the door.
Let's buy some Wrangler jeans and be real live men.
I hope one day I make out with someone in a taco truck :(
I'm glad I inspire you to reach for the stars
Or a taco
I’m a lady. I promise I won’t oogle your junk when we go skinny dipping.
I'm so gassy and it's your fault.
Randomize
