very cute, but more "I wanna put you in my pocket and keep you as a pet" and less "please bang me" type of cute.
I wish i could convert my hornyness to productiveness. I would have written a fucking book by now.
its like whenever the snow comes all the hott girls drop out of school. where are they
Oh. They ARE dating. Kinda sad. Have such an urge to be a huge bitch and steal him but my morality is in the way. FUCK YOU MORALITY.
I feel like letting the same guy who shot him dig the pellet out of his leg with a pocket knife was the bigger mistake
They should have to wear some identification that warns you to stay away. Like one of those cones dogs wear to keep them from biting stitches. CONE OF SHAME.
Friend date it is then. Question: Can friends engage in sexual activities after dates?
I want to lick his teeth again. Is that a creepy thing to say?
I'm about to fuck a girl in an old school Tony Kukoc Bulls jersey. About to earn my third championship ring in sex
I need rollerblades now
Rollerblades pick up bitches
Bless her heart. Her stupid, drunk, adderall-ed heart.
We spent 45 minutes searching the crevices of our friend's car with a pair of tweezers trying to find the acid that we dropped
I’m not closing myself off the to the possibility of making a bad life choice.
My new dentist just kinda stared at me when I told him that I used to have partial dentures after breaking 2 teeth while beating the shit out of someone, until I puked them into the toilet and flushed them after getting high and making myself undercooked mac and cheese.
yeah. i tried to refuse to leave unless the burger king himself escorted me out. that didnt fly
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