dude you have to find out what a girl's name is before you sleep with her. if her name is debbie she's boring, if her name is lauren she's an overrated hoebag, if her name is meagan she gived bad head.
even your uterus rejects him.
apparently my uterus is the smartest part of my body.
This guy just walked into class and first thing he did was grab the garbage can, walk to his desk and say "just in case"
shes perfect for him. shes never seen a penis so she has nothing to compare his to.
I was chocking and even did the sign for it..And you continued to just laugh
Do you think the guy at the front desk was watching us last night? Although we were in a public pool, therefore our tits were free game.
You told them to let you give him stitches claiming you were a certified nurse because you've taken plant biology classes
I'm sorry for peeing on your door. But it was your decision to open it.
nah we got kicked outta the bar after the bouncer saw us putting straws up Chelsea's nose to make her look like a walrus after she fell asleep at the table
I invited you and you fucked me in the face with the penis of disappointment and shit.
Might be time to reevaluate my life. Banned from red roofs inns. Apparently I puked in ice machine. 3 hotels in a year.
Anyhow, I am sorry for being obnoxious about wanting more sex and forcing you to eat lunchmeat off of my ginormous nipples. I knew that you weren't going to succumb to my pushy demands
I just want to be like "i dont know you but ive seen your penis & i like it"
Did you mark a random day on my calendar as National Seth Day?
Sounds like a legit day to me.
I'm gonna make out with this 38 yr old. Mark my words. I don't even have daddy issues.
Randomize
