I have my period so I felt bad and blew him with cash cab in the background. I wanted to yell out the answers but my mouth was full.
We had sex in his tahoe, talked about how we don't love each other and then high fived twice. Best Day Ever
just throwing this out there: period starts tomorrow sooo either sex tonight or not until tues/weds.
i get a bj anyways so it's really your choice.
k i'll be over in 5.
His facebook interests include 'unstrapping velcro'.
But guess what. I'm gonna roll over and go to sleep cuz there's no cuddling in phone sex.
I think i can make this amish girl legitimately hot.
There's no point in calling it Big Titties Tuesday if girls with big tits don't get anything special
Well he can play the xylophone with his erect cock... So he's got that going for him
When I tell my children how I survived hurricane Sandy I'll probably leave out the threesome
The last thing I remember was riding in a grocery cart with two strangers while a cop pushed us
But for real though. That weed tastes like the jolly laughter of Santa Claus.
if it wasn’t 100% before, it is now that i will most definitely die a quesadilla related death
If anyone needs me I'll be in the bathtub, eating fast food and shooting straight vodka while I seriously evaluate my life choices and cry.
I need you to teach me how to be roommates with somebody I'm not fucking.
No I will not paint you for Mardi Gras in town. It is going to rain and you don't need another ID charge
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