just do it
fine only cuz shes asian
I decided to follow my clitoris instead of my heart.
we did rock-paper-scissors to see who would find out if you had alcohol poisoning
He used my blackberry to make a voice recording of me orgasming, then set it as my ringtone while I was sleeping. I discovered this during a staff meeting this morning.
I don't know if it's the amount i drank last night or the number of taylor swift statuses on facebook but i feel like puking everywhere
My afternoon will now be spent googling genital warts. I think my life is over.
I mean we had sex in a crib. You tell me how my night was.
But first time having sex and he went down on me twice?! I'm gonna marry this guy
I'll make sure to include that in my bridesmaid toast
I was having the most awesome dream about onion rings and you hit me and told me to stop touching you...WTF?
Find me a cup with a lid so I can illegally drink in your car. I'll be there in bout 10 minutes.
you start one little fire by the lake and the police want to talk to you all night...
He said I took his samurai sword off his wall and proceeded to jump off his porch at people coming home from the bar.
I will have to bone him sometime between now and July so he will move all my shit again
And you were like wow I love water shots they taste so good
While we were doing it he looked up at me and said "Does your husband fuck you this good?" Talk about a mood killer....
Randomize
