Having a random hookup so left but love u
he looked about as manly as a guy in a volkswagen bug can look
birthday sex, birthday sex, birthday sex
I'm on my period, period, period
Woke up naked in another mans house. If that keeps happening, then I probably need to go gay. You know to make it ok.
so apparently i worked out for over an hour last night. drinking is the only way i will ever get anything done
He knows my period schedule but not my work schedule.
well i just got discharged from the hospital after getting pegged in the head by a t-shirt gun so thats how my night was.
Just finished my quantum homework in ladies room writing with eyeliner. I am the party/physics champion.
There is an alarming amount of urine in here.
Her hookup left his underwear and shorts in the dorm last night... What he was wearing when he left, we may never know.
My vagina is officially offended.
Im crossing my legs while on the toilet. It's like I'm unconsciously thinking "if im going to barf and shit at the same time, Im at least going to do it LIKE A LADY"
do you think there's enough of the fabric you gave me to make a crop top for a cat?
I woke up this morning next to my computer with Google search results for "how to put out a fire."
I'm very scared to turn around.
the coup got in the way of sex but inauguration day came thru we did it joe
Randomize
