Lets evaluate? U kissed one boss and lef twith another man. I cock teased the other, hardcore had a tongue jammed down my throat, made out w aa third then left in a cab w alex w them all yelling at me and offering rides. My cheek was also licked and bitten by 2 other men and we almost made out (u and me) because they asked. were hired.
The only thing I've had to eat today was the half eaten sausage biscuit I found on my chest when I woke up this morning.
Why did you take off so early
No more beer. And also. Threesome. Maybe. Ill let you know.
The KFC double down is way too much for a drunk. He was just staring at it in awe.
at least he left the skimmer on the side of the pool so i could fish out my thong in the morning
ill do whatever it takes for me to get more high and eat pie
I'm questioning the dried chocolate syrup on my tits.
We just for robbed for the second time. I believe the only thing I have left to my name is my $75 dildo
Someone just bought me a one liter long island and call me maybe is on. I'm going to die
WHY IN THE FUCK DID YOU LET ME DRUNK PUNCH STEVE? HE IS SUCH A NICE GUY!
I hooked up with a guy dressed as Justin Timberlake, while dressed as Britney Spears. Fuck Jessica Biel, all my 90's dreams are coming true.
Never let a one night stand shower at your place. My razor, lotion, and brush disappeared. #girlcode
Just wanted to say, I appreciate your bravery in having read receipts
I'm either hallucinating or there is a dying cat outside my apartment....
Fucked a DJ on a jetski today... I love florriidaaa!
Randomize
