i wish everyone could be as happy as the people in the laxative commericals
How bad was it?
You ran around telling everyone that you were going to click them to death on google earth
period poops. best. ever.
omigod im sitting here with ben and he and i both got that...chick you totally just mass texted that...
Quiet hours sex sucks. I hate finals.
Whoa, Gary Coleman died
Whatchu talkin bout?!?!
Too soon.
some bitch filled my sink with salsa.
He's bringing condoms over for me in case we "bone".... the fact he calls it boning is not a great start.
I know. She seems like she getting that "need some dick" restlessness. Might explain the feisty attitude
Yeah I said my new jacket was waterproof, not puke through your nose proof.
Sorry blacked out and lost my phone. Judging by the looks of my body I fought a cat and fell into a bush.
Im coming down to miami this weekend
We shall drink from the everclear river
Next Halloween, remind me to find a different wingman. Walking out in your pirate costume talking like Captain Ahab while i was banging her and telling me I had to harpoon the white whale really pissed her off.
i'm teaching a bunch of people how to grow weed over snapchat. no shame.
We don't know where he is but he left his pants and what appears to be a tooth here so he's gotta come back sometime
Good to know. If our sexting moves past early 1900s vernacular, I'll be sure to use that once or twice.
Randomize