hey i know this is weird but does alcohol affect pregnancy tests?
just got carried INTO the bar by 4 people. it's like watching my weekend in reverse.
I have not carelessly put myself in herpes way since I got a clean bill of health tyvm.
there is no amount of schooling that prepares you for when your morbidly obese 45 year old patient tells you she has her clit pierced.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Found myself carrying 2 bottles of .89 euro wine about half a mile to where im staying. and someone stopped me and spoke to english. apparently, i reek of drunk american.
She said we "made love." I had to explain to her that when both parties agree that the first time time they have sex both people agree to video tape the whole thing its not "making love" but more like random good time fun sex.
I had to talk to the cops at my front door in a bathrobe, with the buttplug still in.
I found her in my pantry with her shirt off twerking...I tapped her on the shoulder and she said she was giving Chef Boyardee a show and to give her a minute...
u kept repeating to itself "hot cheetos and nacho cheese sauce.."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The last thing I remember is goading each other into a vodka-chugging competition.
We just catapulted a jelly bean off of his hard dick into his mouth.......Happy Easter!
U know this is gone far when im in the bathroom trying to take a pic of my asshole
Just don’t be like me and break up between Christmas and NYE and then get blackout on NYE and puke in your undies.
Im drunk taking pregnancy tests with this really hot girl...i dont know what is happening
I don’t know how to sext. What do you say? What do you don’t say?
Just start quoting WAP lyrics.
Randomize