I called the bartender Mr. Intoxication last night. He thought it was funny until i threw up and blamed it on him
addddeeerrraaaallll.
ok i'm not sure if that was a success statement or a cry for help.
i yelled out "tuesday" during orgasim. he fucked me into 2 days from now.
good, we got high then went swimming. shelly forgot to keep swimming so we tied her to the ladder in the shallow part with her bikini top.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the beer staff turned into a beer spear way to quickly
It's official. The summoning powers of my vagina are unmatched by anything in this world.
Congratulations!! You are the WINNER of a brand new BLOWJOB!! You can collect your prize between the hours of 12pm and 1pm today, anywhere you'd like!!! :)
Oh my fucking god I saw the pictures. What the mother fucking fuck. Destroy the pictures. Destroy the fucking pictures.
Please confirm the destruction of the pictures. NOW.
Is this the 6 foot tall blonde I screwed in the bar last weekend?
In the bar?! Very impressive! But keep guessing!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Her hookup left his underwear and shorts in the dorm last night... What he was wearing when he left, we may never know.
I gave him morning sex, a bag of cookies, and dropped him off at work. I believe I deserve the "best hookup award."
Dude, I'm not going to use a butt plug.
What did we do lastnight that resulted in a $1,896 charge on my credit card with a $2,000 limit
Tomorrow has nothing to do with the threesome
I am the one with the vagina. I get to call it.
Fuck you, i'm all jacked up on bananas lets go somewhere
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