I fink we're distracting them from bumping the proverbial uglies
Who wears a wallet chain?!
That drug basically just makes anything that's in your mouth awesome
we were on a sandy mattress. i was wearing a sweatshirt with a poodle on it and eating a whopper jr. i wouldn't have fucked me either.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Eliza got arrested. What's the protocol on eating an arrested person's sandwich?
Well he's not exactly single.. It's like an open relationship his wife doesn't know about
Just sit in your kitchen floor until something speaks to you.
Were not alcoholics, were just impatient for fridays
Can you pick me up a bottle of make-an-ass-of-myself tonight?
Do you want cuervo gold or silver?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hey, I'm making progress. I haven't thrown up in a bar while wearing a sweater vest in almost two months.
I know he's not here, but I can still see him. I found some of my old stash and its good shit so its expected to see sunlight at night and scary llama men. Midgets or otherwise.
Why the fuck is there a goat in the kitchen
I'm a mess. I mean I almost got off but I'm a fucking rubics cube down there so il givenhim the point
Last night was fun but it wasn't right. I will say that our lives intersected for a brief and intense moment and we will just leave it there.
He’s like an awkward walking penis that has a personality attached
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