69 |D_O
wtf does that mean??
it's a very specialized emoticon, means 'i heard you fucking some dude through my bedroom wall last night and so i listened intently"
I believe that I finger-banged my way to the top of the corporate ladder.
Stuck in the Dallas airport. At the bar. Everytime a flight to DC gets cancelled, I'm takin a shot. Fuck you snow.
people are starting to question the shark bite story
you busted in the room, ripped the covers off of us, ... and fist pumped
Just ducktaped my beer to my bike. See you in ten.
I made her cum... she sounded like Ray Romano
REAL PEOPLE DRINK 3 BEERS ALONE WILL WATCHING THE LIFETIME MOVIE ABOUT PRINCE WILLIAM AND KATE MIDDLETON
I'm about to do the walk of shame in a christmas onesie. What would I do without christmas sweater party season?
she paid $15 and a box of cheerios for their acid
Oh man. I am high, watching The Office and getting pancakes. What a country.
I threw up in the bathtub last night like a decent human being.
so... i have a picture of you and three other girls making kissy faces at this giant stuffed banana you're holding. however, you seem to be violently screaming at it.
Those bitches did NOT have my back.
I really want to stop getting this drunk. I've got the Sunday scaries and it's only Saturday
He ate me out while I was wearing a canada goose parka and a dress hand crafted by a seamstress from yellowknife. I came while watching the northern lights. Most arctic orgasm ever.
Randomize
