brad dismisses pussy with prejudice
When my girlfriend drinks sangria it's like winning the vagina lottery
I knew we were gonna fuck after she told me she's seen that Porno before
He yelled "juice on the loose", yes i am sure i need plan b
there's a barbecue in the shower. I'd like to know who got this to fit inside perfectly. impressive
Tell me you didn't have sex with my dad.
You slid down the bannister into a split. Lines were crossed.
I can't handle dick pics with conversational captions
Ran into his sister at the gym and hit it in the parking lot. I dont even feel like a bad friend she got a boob job and lost 20 lbs its not even the same sister
holy shit the woman im hooking up with is closer to my moms age than my own
I just gotta say that I feel so much better now that I got some. I mean I feel like a normal functioning adult ready to contribute to society.
Should I tell him how he got the bruise on his ass or just enjoy his theories?
Looks like a sea otter shaved my vagina. Keep an eye out for me this weekend, no one can see this.
Turns out naked yoga wasn't a pickup line. I feel betrayed.
I need you to know I’m weirdly very sexually attracted to Charlie Puth now
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