4 am. She strained the mac and cheese onto her legs. She has no skin.
Did you not learn anything for "HERPES SCARE 2010".........
just saw someone climb out of the dumpster at cvs and start walking down the street like it was completely normal
he's paying for my abortion by participating in an alcohol study. dont try to tell me we wouldn't be classy parents
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I woke up because a stranger was shoving an already lit bowl into my mouth. Spring break is awesome
Also, if someone could cut me off before im rolling around the yard pantsless with a 40 year old lesbian that would be awesome.
Let's be honest. I make up for my well below average sized penis with a great personality and a possibly successful future
Is it weird that I noticed my lower half feels strange and then further realized it's bc I'm wearing underwear to bed for the first time in weeks..maybe months?
I'm gonna write a song for the kids called "you're systematically killing your mother". In it I will explain that my recent hypertension and increase in smoking is due to them being dicks
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Thank fucking Christ I was not wearing pants or eating chocolate cake last night.
I'm a full-grown woman and thusly I expect my sphincters to behave themselves.
I’m ready to be reckless and make stupid decisions, and I need you to support me in that.
Did you apologize to him for the trip to the strip club as a first date or is that something that just gets swept under the rug??
Going to the eye doctors drunk makes you feel like your doing a sobriety test! They have to know..
I don't wanna SLEEP with him, I want to start bar fights with him. There's a difference.
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