i think i have herpe
just one?
Well, for starters you dressed up in all Green and kept singing that song from "A Goofy Movie". Then you made us call you Powerline for the rest of the night...needless to say no, you didn't hook up with her
i wish i could swallow nair and shit it out and it would get rid of all my ass hair.
i feel as if its time to shave my pubes but i should wait until before the party. nobody likes a sloppy drunk girl with a stubble-crotch.
story of my life.
hanging out with you guys is like living the wikipedia entry for drugs...not sure i can handle that tonight.
She danced with a broom while telling me I was "cool as shit" and she "wishes she could take a portion of my big ass and attach it to hers" then she passed out
I think we should take up crocheing or stamp collecting....something completely lacking penises
I feel like we should apologize to the light saber. We were REALLY inappropriate with it last night.
The last thing I remember from that party was me shouting "hold my feet I'm going in strapped like Rambo"
We got high and watched Winnie the Pooh. Isn't that what every normal person does on their break?
I just lost my handcuff virginity and not in the sexy way.
He listens to me complain and in return I send him naked pictures. It's a win win situation
Jus had a dream that I borrowed bob dylans car to save us from a pack of raptors. Pretty stoked about it.
Welcome aboard the S.S. struggle. I'll be your captain for today's voyage and Jeremy is your first mate. Just sit back and relax while we navigate the seas of drunken regret. Your forecast for the day is violently hungover with a chance of "shit, that really did happen!"
you going clubbing tonight?
well its tuesday isnt it
Randomize