He introduced her to the DMA meeting by saying: in the past few years i've never seen someone work so hard for so little success
I'm so turned on right now it's fucking stupid. I hate burger king commercials
you were so high you spent the rest of the night smelling pepper to prove you can sneeze with your eyes open
This unplanned pregnancy thing is really taking all the fun out of football season.
And it was confirmed to me that I did in fact cut my girlfriend out of her dress with my sword.
currently shading my boobs to make it look like i have mass cleavage...thanks art school
We are going to be Siegfried and Roy for Halloween and you are going to be the tiger.
My head. My head is the problem. Also alcoholism.
begin the sex magic rocket ship countdown
Just peed out a window, not entirely sure it's open. Can't tell. I'll find out in the morning.
His buddy came running in the room after we had sex, and started "sponging" the sweat off my forehead with his sport wristband.
I woke up in the basement of a pizza restaurant... I would say the tequila hit me pretty hard.
Oh dear. Sending much love.
Just send a machete.
Well, if I'm gonna go gay, it's gonna be for NPH
He passed out while I was riding him but stayed hard long enough for me to orgasm. He definitely earned the blow job I’m going to wake him up with in the morning!
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