I think i peed on brittanys purse
you turned your livingroom into a bong?
Woke up this morning with one boob drawn on to look like the globe. Questionable?
life just isnt the same w/o real world cancun
It was annoying to wait 4 hour for him to be inside for 5 seconds.
jess passed out on the pong table. it was depressing until we started singing shania twain an hour later and heard her muffled voice singing along.
i have no feeling in my penis or fingers but i think it was worth it
i also took my stockings off in the bathroom and blew my nose with them in the cab ride home. james was appalled
I'm the fucking queen of sexting. I just made a blowjob sound so poetic I'm wishing I were a guy just so I could blow me. Learn from me.
Shotgunning beers to finish a midterm project at 3am is a good idea right?
He left his boxers here. Can I keep them and make a shrine or would that be creepy?
My roomate had an hour long melt down about her life choices not realizing I was in the middle of having sex... So yea it went pretty horribly.
Always a gay best friend, never a bridesmaid
Can you send me the picture you took of me smoking a joint with the cat make-up on?
My diet fell off the wagon when I began texting the pizza delivery guy my location on frat row.
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