Tell me the dirtiest joke you know
Sarah Palin
god, I love you
I really wish you were half the slut you're sister was in college
The only image of you you know is from reflections or pictures. Its 2d. But what other people see is 3d. How do you know that's your real face! MIND.BLOWN.
Look, I'm just saying... paying ur respects to the neighbors who had a death in the family with food u steal from the neighbors having the cookout may result in a negative karma situation.
So stoned i forgot i was in bed
I'm not saying Tijuana was a bad idea, I'm saying that we make poor life choices. And Steve was robbed by the police.
Everything was cool until I tried to photo bomb those Hells Angels, then it's all a blank
I just masturbated and watched youtube makeup videos, which was just an extension of masturbation.
Drunk wound on my leg hast healed and neither has my dignity
I SWEAR TO GOD IF SHE FUCKS WITH OUR GOLD GENE POOL
The more I think about it, the more convinced I am that I'm the solution to all of T-Swift's guy problems.
I am actually offended he hasn't asked me to sleep with him yet to get better grades...I wanted the whole college experience.
I love when my neighbors have passionate, loud sex to remind me that I'm not getting laid
My face feels like a midget just gave birth to quintuplets
I took a vibrator for a weekend with my parents instead of a boyfriend. I obviously have my life together.
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