my mother and i just seriously had a convorsation about why you cant Google "Refurbished Dildos"
there should be a national holiday dedicated to how high i am
we're going to dress like we're asking for it, because we are
Also you were throwing your phone yelling this is durable as shit
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's sad that my net worth at the moment is 4 beers
I had no where to run... The dumpster sounded like a good idea at the time
it looks like my getting laid tonight is going to depend on my knowledge of native birds. this is a weird party
it's my favorite when the couple downstairs are having sex so loud that i feel like I'm part of a threesome
second-hand sex is fun, isn't it?
I just climbed out the passenger side of my car because there was a spider on mine. I'm doing adulthood right
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You don't have to have sex with both if us but I would like a little positive fucking regard.
Just responding to the most professional request I've ever gotten to get shitfaced.
Eh, I don't question what my penis likes. It just does what it does.
Nothing to be ashamed of. I bet Oprah has sharted.
I want to conceive our bastard child on an athletic field. Why can't we make this happen?
Why is there a mildly painful bruise on my back?
You slipped off the sink last night.
Why was I on the sink......?
;)
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