Last night you told her she was rocking the beer gut. Still wondering why you have that black eye?
She solidified the fact that the icon from Wendy's is the only ginger I care for
How much explanation does bbqsexapalooza need?
I truly believe that the solid foundation of any healthy relationship is a drunken one night stand so I can just get all the nasty shit out on the table
every single time I see a picture of the two of them on facebook, I want to just call her and scream "your boyfriend said I give the best head on the east coast". But I've been told that would be inappropriate.
Who the fuck superglued glowsticks to my arm.
with a cock that big I don't even care that he makes a convincing drag queen
Most desperate stoner moment; dropped our hard earned resin ball in the sand, rinsed it off and then did knife hits in the kitchen cuz we broke our only pipe
I'm home now if you wanna come over.
Sloane just tried to lick my eyeball. I'm going to regain my composure then I'll be there.
I just rolled a blunt and took my bra off. I'm not going anywhere.
Well, he hasn't actually seen me naked. Just my boobs... and the left side of my vagina.
I'll do my best. he just keeps yelling beer and doing dick helicopters
I legit just swiped right with a Tinder feminist just to get in an argument with her. Soo that's my Friday night so far...
How do u explain to your grandma that your relationship status is hooking up with randoms at a bar
His mom knocked on the door during morning sex because we were being too loud...now i have to meet her for the first time
Randomize
