i cvme to yuor rooom...wherer are youf?
please be gone before i get back
Well we ran into the cornfields when the cops got there. We'd been hiding in there for 45 mins when he asks me "So this wasn't exactly how I'd planned this but I thought I'd ask. How do you feel about oral sex?"
i cant finish this easy-mac because i need it for a chaser.
I am a mess. Weirdest thing: I woke up with a hammer under my pillow. No idea why.
I feel like hell. The amount of black beans I found in my hair tells me I hit rock bottom
Being drunk at the hospital is better than i expected. I got to hide and play in the little kids waiting area. Btw no one is hurt
No, its ok. Im playing strip pretty pretty princess im currently dueling for the crown
I have to talk to myself and be all "you are NOT horny tonight"
You were sitting in the tub, clothed, squirting my KY all over yourself. You said "it's warm." then passed out.
The amount of effort it's taking me to not shit my pants this morning is probably a sign to slow down the drinking
I just shit my bed. Go ahead and make your 40 year old incontinence jokes now.
I found myself looking up beard accounts while masturbating, I guess that's what it's come to.
YOU CAN'T GET A TATTOO BECAUSE OF KPOP FANFICTION. THAT'S NOT HOW LIFE WORKS
I don't want to go to sleep. I like partying with myself.
Go shave, and then go fuck the man
YOU ARE SO CRUDE, I LOVE YOU
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