I had a dream last night where you were a transsexual in a low cut blue dress with lovely long brown hair. You were very pretty. I hope you are well.
i think you shook his penis after he was done peeing.
this is like black Friday for my dealer. I'm literally standing in line.
I'm still trying to decide if it's a complement when he said "I'd like to subscribe to your daddy issues".
New York to be Host to America’s Biggest Singles Event
I am 100% positive that I have seen a porno that was shot in this bar.
I like yr title more along "the hot Russian I have sex with."
It's official. Hawaii is 100% better when you're stoned.
Wow. This hand sanitizer smells awesome. It's like I just gave a handjob to a fruit basket.
I think I'm just going to up-end a bottle of wine and look through pictures of what my life used to be.
Kylie Jenner Wasn’t in the Kardashian X-Mas Cards & the Internet is Losing it
I'm wearing a dinosaur hat bikini cone bra over my shirt. So good things are happening
Yuck. My throat feels like someone chucked a couple of Maltov cocktails down it and finished it off with a super soaker filled with Jameson.
As soon as he came we went to Dairy Queen. That drive through lady was very condescending about our "just fucked" ice cream.
Oooo yea. You face planted on my bed but only half your body made it so you noodled onto the floor but kept saying prepare to be murdered which is when you started taking your pants off but stopped at your ankles cause it was too hard
I hung my underwear from the tree in his front yard. Consider my territory marked.
Like when I see him I look straight through his appearance and just envision a big walking penis.