I just found that girl ____ on facebook, her activities include "church nursery" yikes
Tonight i am praying for god to turn my pussy into apple pie because i cant count the number of times bruce chooses food over sex.
nothing like morning wood sex at 4pm. funemployment ftw
He knows as soon as he hits chameleon eye status drunk, he is guaranteed to piss the bed we NEED to push him there
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just woke up to the best idea ever. Vodka infused BUTTER. Take a second, and think of the possibilities.
Every single item that was in my fridge is now in my hot tub. Please help
The girls danced. I drank. Then I danced cause I was drunk. Then I ripped tim's shirt off cause I'm awesome.
I have got to stop taking so many uppers and downers simultaneously. My life is a Dali painting.
Got head at the top of a water slide over-looking the valley while wearing a sombrero and drinking a corona. Epic.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It might look like I curled my hair last night but it's just the jiz.
As I took my shirt off he commented on how great my boobs where. I responded with "thanks, I grew them myself"
These tits shall not be calmed
So I fucked a guy with his mouth wired shut last night never thought id cross that off my imaginary bucket list
Is it bad form to puke out of a dorm window to avoid looking bad in front of the people in your room?
How about from a sixth floor window?
I think my liver just tried to kill me, we need to slow down
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