You can't have hate sex in a hallway!!
Worst relationship ever. Keep in mind I've dated two married chicks and a Mormon.
she crawled under her car and passed out. Unfortunately her feet were sticking out and someone called 911 because they thought she had been run over.
she cried into her fur with two handfuls of money- she was the physical manifestation of white girl problems
you asked my brother if you could eat the cupcake that you found. you were showing him a baked potato
i'm gonna fuck his crew, i'm gonna wax my asshole. i'm gonna make them all cry tears of sex joy then move to colorado.
Dude, i don't know. I don't remember anything after we started chanting/playing "shot of gin."
He just stared me dead in the eye as he continued to beat off. Then said "you were going to catch me sooner or later".
No cash. I had to buy four bowls of soup to meet the credit card limit. I'm not even upset. SO MUCH SOUP.
Would it be inappropriate to trade Christmas cookies for sex?
You are one of my favorite baseball you have fun today
i only stock magnum condoms so if the guy i bring home doesn't fit in them he only gets to eat me out. no exceptions.
The fact that you got a stranger guy to buy you a pizza off tinder makes me feel amazing
I also have bagel bites. I know that's not as big an incentive as the cocksucking but.....
YOU RAISED A SWORD OVER YOUR HEAD AND SCREAMED AT HIM WHAT THE FUCK ELSE DID YOU THINK WOULD HAPPEN?!
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