think what you will about my sexuality, just get the cigarettes
I saw his dick soo much last night when I saw him this morning all I saw was penis where his face should be
worst. lesbian. ever. i'm not sure she knows a clit from a pencil eraser.
Change your flight to Denver. That's where my penis is.
If u were an xman, what would ur power be? I would shoot lasers from my boobs.
Sign #1 that I'm not ready to be a mother: I'm shopping for "maternity fishnets".
It was just like old times except for going to hangover throw up before waking my parents up to open presents. Merry Christmas!
I've carried my liver for over 24 years. If it can't carry me for the next 24 hours than it deserves to be damaged.
Dude, you left ME alone in your house. With your fully-stocked wine cellar. Why would you do that to yourself?
It's like a teen mom casting at the Obgyn's office. I feel great about my positive life decisions.
The bond between me and cheese is something no man can understand.
We fucked so hard that when I orgasmed I tore his towel rack off the wall. He was more impressed than mad.
Because she seems like the type to give it up for a box of fruit rollups.
hitting rock bottom is getting taziki in your hair & simply putting it in a bun instead of actually dealing with it, just like your problems
OMG I accidentally abducted a cat. Now there is a cat in my apartment. I NEED TO UNDO WHAT I HAVE DONE
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