I thought spray tan was a myth
?
You know, something that only happens in Jersey
There's a Cowboys game and a Rangers game on at the same time...talk about Sophie's choice
:O -> O: ... that's emoticon for "he threw up in my mouth while we were making out"
FYI, when you wake up, please note that I puked in your shoes because I sstubbed my tooee, not becus I was drunk.
After he came he asked what I was doing for thanksgiving.
If I had a penis, I would stick it EVERYWHERE. I don't know what these guys are doing.
just got in my apt...and theres jungle juice here i left from over a month ago..this could be interesting...or deadly
I just saw a dude sitting IN a bush, weeping and playing a harmonica. I hope your day is going better than his.
By the way, we're gonna have to get a new rug for the livingroom i kinda started ours on fire...
Everyone in the office is in total denial. I asked my boss what he did this weekend and he said "nothing much." But I know we were both thinking about the orgy.
Wat day did I have sex in my sleep? I just made a Dr appt for Friday and I want to talk to her about it
So that advice that humming stops you from puking? Yeah no, just puked through my nose.
Our drunk hook up was interrupted by the delivery guy. When he came back to my room we ate the gyros and went back to sex like we didn't take a lunch break.
She's hot and all. It's just I don't want to become Eskimo brothers with my sister
i told him the only way i'd fuck him was if he saved me during the zombie apocolypse and took me to a tastefully decorated yet impenetrable hideout.
Randomize
