hahahahahahhahahahaha. 26, Dominican, has a funny accent, thinks I'm hot. Tots boning.
He looked way older than 15. He probably thought that since I have braces I was 15. Fuck. The 6 year age gap is never to be spoken about. Especially because what happened constitutes as illegal.
What if we had a smart house and we could just say "baked" and it would rain donuts?
sorry i was making out with matt didn't mean for it to sound like that. there was no tone
there should be a new saying, don't text and tongue
He poured syrup on all those broken dishes because "syrup is magical, and by the time we wake up, they'll be fixed."
You never did explain why you were in wal-mart with a wok full of popcorn.
He just dragged himself across the floor on his back claiming to be "the swiffer" help
took adderall before wrapping presents, ended up making paper snowflakes for two hours
He's currently surrounded by roughly 23 girls he fucked and never called. He may not make it out of here. Bar of doom? Or of redemption?
Please come and rip my uterus out before it does it itself
Found my bike today. On top of the garage. I'm not even going to ask myself why.
How do you feel? I threw up in a towel. Also, a lot of other things.
He was feeling me up but acting like he was asleep. Like WTF does that mean??
apparently when we were gone the parents play strip connect 4
You know something is wrong with your lifestyle when you have to clean easy Mac cheese powder off of your scale
at least it's not cocaine like last time
Randomize
