I only want to know people that are dynamic intelligent and totally insane
Life lesson: when driving and throwing up, choose a paper bag over plastic. Fuck my life.
Went biking. Saw homeless guy beating in the park. Thought of you <3
HE HAS A FUCKING TWIN. HE HAS A TWIN. I'M NOT DRUNK THERE IS TWO OF THEM.
OMG bikini contest at the bar. You can see this one chicks scar from her c-section and I'm pretty sure she is the best of the bunch.
2 more and I will have fucked 75 percent of my acting class. best. elective. ever.
I'm never waking up next to someone after sex again. It's alllll downhill from there.
It's been so long that I've occasionally forgotten I own a vagina
It takes a special friend to go vibrator shopping with
Yes. It does.
This girl is wasted dancing to The Final Countdown. She's grinding on a guy who came to the bar in a track jacket and a wife beater
I was standing in my mom's kitchen in only my neon green thong, eating pizza over the garbage can, and sobbing while he was yelling at me.
He played me Kanye.. Speaking my love language.. He got a well deserved BJ
I LACK THE NECESSARY BRAIN FUNCTIONS TO BE ABLE TO PROPERLY RESPOND TO THAT
When your job has killed your spirit to the point that you don't want to flirt with the cute, tall guy at Enterprise
GIRL PLEASE. GO BACK AND POP THE TITTY OUT
It's probably not a good thing when it isn't even 6:30 and I've already drank an entire bottle of wine. By myself. I'm watching Spice World and I just bought 2 Spice Girls albums off itunes.
Make that 3 Spice Girls albums.
Randomize
