Screwed.edu
It's not called being bisexual its called making out with anyone that has a mouth
they just tried to tell me they weren't big into drugs. A) it was the 70's. B) I've seen the pictures.
he kept asking me "do you love it? tell me you love it" as I was riding him.
and...?
I told him it was alright.
Ummmm yeah ..,.. All three girlfriends I have right now are chatting with each other at the party...... I'll see you on the other side
Just convinced airport security that im sober. All i do is win.
His mom walked into the kitchen smiling, made a scotch on the rocks, hit my bong, and told us goodnight enthusiastically. He's suddenly more appealing to me.
no i do not regret standing at the wendys drive thu handing the employees mardi gra beads to get free chicken nuggets
He brought me bullshit flowers and a bullshit apology. Even shrek did more than that for Fiona. And he's an ogre. Does this not say anything about him?
drunk. just smoked a spliff with a 19yr old hungarian bike taxi driver and bonded over the difficulties of getting weed in a different country. idk y shit like this isnt in the study abroad info packets
MEET ME OUTSIDE YOUR HOUSE IN THREE MINUTES. BE DRUNK. THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
We've reached the point in our fuck buddy relationship where we are playing words with friends. This is too intimate.
we're all going for beer and wings at 7. inflate your girlfriend and bring her along too.
Im gonna go lick parts of my apartment. Good night and be ever vigilant, you never know when I'm coming to epoxy your hand to you nipple.
I stole $10 from the guy I hooked up with last night.Not sure why but it was definitely more satisfying.
Randomize