I'm in your bed right now
Okay meet you there give me 10
Don't think you can make me leave either
Give me ten I ha e to be ******'s wingman I want you
Well you know what I always say about freshmen.... If you want it, and they've got it... get it.
just watched paranormal activity stoned. laughed the whole time and screamed when they turned on the lights. eating doritos. I love my life
in the morning i found her name, number and address on one of the empty pizza boxes. also said "ps. if you find my shoes please mail to me."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
let's put it this way: i'm gonna stop drinking and get a gym membership. she's that hot
you were saying "i am the vodka queen!" and then in a different voice replying to yourself "all hail the vodka queen! you are so beautiful!"
the girl in my class has a rolling backpack and just told it to stay. im too hungover for this.
oh yea it is. i was not expecting to look at a snowbank and just see flying mushrooms
Thats why you have fulfilling relationships with nice girls and i have kinky sex with crazies
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Doing blow at 6am to "wake myself up for clinicals" was a baaaaad idea
Just watched a guy puke off his bike. Beyond impressed. He didn't even swerve
getting up at 8am to start drinking seemed like a much better idea before I had to wake up at 8am
If you take a post shower shit just get back in bed. You're better off starting your whole morning all over again.
He told me"I think your ready for this" and went into his closet whipped out a movie certiffied light saber.
I had my room mate call my phone after last night and it was in an uncooked quesadilla
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