Sexting assembly today. Fuck yes
I can't believe you let me try to pierce your nipple with a dart last night
Im handcuffed to some kid i hardly know. there are no cops involved
The only ground rules are no one is allowed to come who will say "no, that's a bad idea" or "what if we get arrested?"
If I wanted to fuck someone, I'd go for John. I'm meeting Bryan cuz I wanna get to know him better. And eventually fuck him. But not this Tuesday.
it got awkward when the only couple not hooking up was just watching..
Since your rent is paid til the first, we decided to use your apartment as the beer pong room. We apologize in advance for losing your security deposit.
In all fairness I didnt see your dick because it was already in her
I was ashamed to still be in my green tank this morning, but there's a guy here in full on bright green pants and a green blazer. He looks like the lucky charms guy stretched out at drunker than usual. Now, I fade into the background.
I don't like getting sloppy drunk but I don't like getting just half drunk either, I'm way too responsible if my blood alcohol level is below 0.2
Drinking heavily at 3pm and about to rescue a 30lb street turtle. Dont even bother attempting to rise to this level bitch
i have a raging boner for Saturday, day drinking is one of my top favorite things right next to alligator wrestling and blowing shit up
Drowning in science and also vodka. Hope you're having fun.
I just woke up drenched in beer, in a puddle of beer, and cuddling a bottle of tequila
I added our drug dealer to the quickbooks software babe, he is listed under vendor's as an expense category... money management is such a bitch...
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