Dude, Her having kids just means she puts out.
am i the only one who has tried sucking their own cock????
I can't believe you made out with me with a french fry in your mouth.
She was asian and in a relationship... my two weaknesses
Mother fucker. I'm a 30J now. I'm fucking speechless
I just undressed him with my eyes. And gave him a 10 inch penis. I hope its true.
I've also hijacked your can opener. Sadly not for the same sexual reason as the muddler.
i wish his balls had a scratch and sniff sticker elsewhere so i would know before i even went down there
I don't know where he learned to eat pussy but I thought I was going blind
you stuck pieces of bread to your face with peanut butter and asked if it looked like you had a facial yeast infection.
ohhhh that's why they asked me to leave...
Get up, biotch, before I come traipsing in there to rip apart whatever god-forsaken spoon you have going on between the two of you and your dog.
I just sneezed and margarita mix and ash came out of my nose. I love jersey
i just love the holidays, i hotboxed a gingerbread house last night
There was a woman who drank mouth wash to get drunk during her supposed detox...this is def the internship for me!
You were filing your nipples with a nail file to "make them sharper"
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