He's totally hot and awesome. And he's a Democrat
Good, so he won't mind when you kill the baby.
Tonight has been like a good ass fucking high school movie
Have you not heard of Jennifer's supreme lust for William Shatner? She wants to eat Taco Bell off of his love handles
You'd think after all these years of evolution that it would be longer than a golf pencil.
you go from almost hooking up with the hottest guy at the party, to going home with your ex....how is that even mathematically possible
You always know it is going to end badly when a guy asks if he met you at a "coed naked lawn bowling party"
The best part of tonight is drunk commenting on my moms pic about how birds just want to give you diseases and pluck out your eyes
Reunion weekend was a success. Had 3 ex's inside my vag. Hat trick!
I'm wearing a utility belt filled with alcohol
Ramen still too hot to eat. Eating it anyway. Stoner girls feel no pain
although steph and I had 3 bottles of wine by that point and watched an opera that featured a black dildo so anything was possible really
everything in the house taste like gin even the water, friday nite was a success
Looks like he unfriended you too. I feel like we were both just handed negative pregnancy tests.
That awkward moment when you're drunk enough to crave cocaine, but you're sober enough to know it's only Tuesday.
whenever dudes said you had nice tits you'd scream at them "This double push-up bra is full of deceit and lies!"
Randomize
