I dont get chicks, its like they only care about themselves and money
sounds like you understand them just fine
The night began with "let go home early so we can study for my 9am final" and ended with "show me your boobs for a free pack of gum".My breasts are worth 14 sticks for a dollar.
I've slept with so many tools that you'd think my pussy was Home Depot.
my girlfriend just informed me I need to get tested and so do you
girlfriend?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I cant. I'm trying to smell my vagina.
At home depot. Final room inspection is tmrow, gotta paint over the puke stains
If you can't find your cat in the morning it's cause i put him in the laundry basket and then put the laundry basket in the shower.
we are watching a video on ethics because somebody wrote "butt sex" on the attendance sign in sheet
All i know is we had 4 people on a tandum bike, and told the cops we couldnt stop because our momentum was so good.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Lots of alcohol last night skiing this morning = me throwing up off chairlift
Alright, deal. Settling two drug deals before noon is what I call a productive day. I'm not even gonna go to math, I've practiced enough numbers for the day.
Dude, did you really "knight me" and tell me I had permission to bang your sister last night?
IF WE WERE REALLY BEST FRIENDS FOREVER YOU GUYS WOULD AGREE TO A WATCHING A PORNO PARTY
Why can't I come over and snuggle you and make you lick my boots
I don't mean to alarm you but are the strongest testicles in the family. I just learned I can lift 90 lb with my balls! Beat that.
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