THE most awkward situation I have EVER been in
Also, I just threw up a little in my mouth and had to act like everything was totally fine.
What a tease, dude. She's giving me emotional blue balls.
he asked me if i had ever jacked off high and then referred to it as a "man-to-man question"
is drinking for groundhog day legit?
well you blacked out on MLK day and we pregamed arbor day, so yes
we fucked while he was on the clock. He didnt even take off his bullet proof vest. Dont tell me thats not bad ass.
I think I just snorted head and shoulders by mistake.
Does taking an old homeless guy to the strip club, buying him lap dances, and calling him pops all night count as a good deed???
I asked him if he wanted a pillow, and he replied "No. Batman never had pillows."
I knew things were bad when my gyno recommended meditation.
your penis is a great and majestic leader among the penises.
And the 'kicked out of Xmas party' trophy goes to me. 3rd nomination, first win.
In reference to the club we were headed to our cab driver told us about the time he had sex with a woman on the dance floor there. And what do you know, they're celebrating their 22 marriage anniversary together this year! True love does exist!
We watched X-Files, ate pizza, and he played with my butt. It was a pretty standard Monday.
But if you move out who will get drunk with me on the roof and yell at boys?!?
How many weight watcher activity points do you think sex is worth?
Randomize
