Is it bad that everytime I read or hear "Woo Hoo" I immediately think of sex because of The Sims?
It smelt so bad when i tried biting off her underwear that i didn't want to touch with my mouth
Psycho is an understatement. U were running around the house screaming IM UNDER THE IMPERIOUS CURSE
he said the way to his heart was through his stomach, i told him if he wanted to eat my food he had to eat my kitty
smooth operator
I just got kidnapped by the rugby team for a scavenger hunt. I'm "the girl you had sex with last night"
any interest in drunk sledding later? if not, any interest in driving me to the hospital later?
take 2 Ambien then drink a Red Bull and watch Alice in Wonderland. Trust me.
Absolute soulmates or functional alcoholics?
Can't be the first without the last
We dropped so many bottles they would only give us plastic cups. We actually drank ourselves back to preschool.
You could become Eskimo brothers with my dad. How can you pass that up? You pussy.
Discovery: bouncers seem to get really upset about fire
I'll never get why we had to sing the entire full house theme to the cab driver.... never drinking rum again.
He looks like he was the one that always had koolaid stains around his mouth as a kid, he can fuck off.
My mom is selling her car. I'm secretly relieved I won't ever have to tell her about that time you puked in it
um care to explain the stolen chinchila under greg's bed..i'd be fine with it if it wasnt chewing up the stash
Randomize
