Farted during a conference call.SBD. permeated the room people were gonna puke.noone could say anything or leave cus we were on the phone with clients. coworkers were outraged.how I still have a job is beyond me.
I love that we get drink and call each other crying. It's kind of our thing.
There's a girl in my class named "La-a" pronouced "Luh Dash uh" I hate everyone
you kept falling over in mid-conversation and you just got right back up as if nothing happened...
So i guess my mom went into the kitchen and asked me why i was making mac and cheese at 4 in the morning and apparently i yelled at her to "get the fuck back bitch you don't know my life"
Just found 2 diff. colored pubes in my underwear..new record.
Just had perfomance review. I was told the best example of my integrity was when I told my boss I was going to fail the random drug test due to my weekend coke binge. She said that took a lot of character.
I bought a dress specifically for face plant durability... this is how serious I am about my drunk status this weekend
just letting you know, you took a hit of the blunt while sleeping. happy birthday
It's times like this I miss having my nipples pinched
Pavlovs bj experiment 2012. Welcome to the program.
Been awake for 50 some odd hours. I've discovered I can spew out maaaad papers whilst coked out of my face. My roommates probably think I'm dead. Money well spent. You?
I just let my boss bend me over his desk and spank me. I think that is some sort of American dream.
A guy caught me talking to a sock today in the Laundry room if it makes you feel any better
Sadly that does. Why...where you talking to a sock
Bc I didn't know him and I asked him where he came from and why he was hanging out with my thongs
she wouldnt leave because they were playing One Direction. I'm dating a thirteen year old.
Randomize
