you want to go make fun of the strippers on try out night
i got kicked out last time for laughing
If penises could fly, my ass would totally be an airport.
First thing I heard on the radio when I got in the car: "humans and dinosaurs used to live happily together"... I need to stop listening to Christian radio...
I haven't been able to trust a girl since spanks came out
Well, shes famous, an alcoholic, hillarious, and has big boobs.... Pretty much my only aspirations in life.
christmas break will be like the 25 days of orgasms
Not only was there cake on the wall but someone shoved cake and meat in a cup and put it in the fridge.
I wasn't concerned until I realized he was using the vase my birthday flowers came in as a " big glass" for his 151 and coke.
Will you push me around in a wheel chair, introduce me to people, and say nothing as I get up and walk away?
My nose hurts from that stripper beating me with her tits
Had a turkey baster with clean pee in it in my pants to pass a drug test, and the bottom fell off, so yeah I'm pretty pissed.
I'm proud of you for choosing to be an organ donor on your fake!!
I swear every time I see him he's either dancing or trying to touch people
Well I just took a pregnancy test... So how's your thanksgiving?
Just for future reference. Do not do zumba while stoned out of your mind.
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