i justawanted to let you know that illi aalways be thwew for ui and o qill waasag youer dog whenebvet u wsnt
winter break is going to suck... i have to put away my college personality and transform into who my parents think i am.
So we were banging and she started puking all over my bed. I'm not sure what's worse, her puking, or that I felt the urge to start singing Flip-adelphia.
The dentist just giggled when he accidentally shot water across my face, I can sense how he treats women.
i mean, some people chug beer and some people chug hard liquor. some people have good ideas and some people have bad ideas. it's all about perspective.
The gym is handing out free condoms this week, motivation to work out this week?
I will also be strapping forties to the puppies.
Hold my feet while i lean out of the window of the truck.
My lips are red and swollen. Solid proof that giving head is a viable alternative to lipstick and plumper.
I remember trying to cut the power to a house I thought was "too bright to understand the meaning of christmas". Pretty sure I blacked out down the street.
after tonight, seriously nothing could taste better than toothpaste
I have a LOT of reasons to worry about radical feminists taking my lady balls, frankly. A lot.
If you are breathing, I want you at your house. No non-breathing-related excuses.
Also CANADIAN LIPS TASTE OF MAPLE SYRUP AND APOLOGIES. SORRY.
I’m not saying you’re wrong, I’m just saying he’s denying what you’re saying.
Randomize
