come over anyways, right now, right this second
it can be a super quick quicky, then you can go back to studying
wow, that sounds SO fun, please stop enticing me with premature ejaculation
My dad just told me if I'm going to smoke pot, to make sure I use a clean needle. WTF?
we just fucked in the mcds parking lot
wasnt he a virgin
yes we got celebratory milkshakes after
My dad walked in on me masturbating in my own apartment.....my own apartment!!
Just found out my 21st birthday is on a Wednesday. The possibilities are cheap, as well as endless.
I woke up with a fake mustache stuck to my chest and I can't even hold down water.
After blacking out and loosing my phone for a month, I found it in the parking lot across the street. Last text "rager in the street". I remember none of this.
I just yelled at a bunch of girl scouts for yelling "cookies" to loudly. That hungover
YOU'RE HIGH AND AT THE GYM OF COURSE YOU FEEL WEIRD
My thighs feel like glass
Also, they sell weed-chocolate covered strawberries. For the romantic stoner.
That was one of the best texts I got today
If my penis could make facial expressions, it would constantly have a smile on.
Do you think Brian would let me smoke while we fuck? I'm not sure ill survive exams without a constant nicotine intake
I think I need a restraining order. I had 15 "selfies" of him on my camera roll......my phone has a lock code on it.
I'm drunk listening and crying to Selena. How's your Monday?
I just woke up with a pair of handcuffs in my pants, can u explain this?
Randomize
