dude wtf did we explode in my microwave last night?
idk but i think it had a face
So I was talking to her on the phone last night and had to mute it so I could take a crap.
Side Note: My mute button doesn't work.
Deffinety need to stop having sex on the beach just took a dump and it was mostly sand
Could someone please kill snooki before she contributes to the gene pool.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I need your advice and before you say it, no, it cannot be solved by a blow job
You clearly don't understand the power you wield with your mouth.
it got awkward when the only couple not hooking up was just watching..
Just mixed vicodin and mucinex. This cold just got fun.
Get in the lobby, you have to sign my boxers
Almost just got kicked out of a bar because the locals spilled beer everywhere when we taught them to shotgun.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Tell me you didn't have sex with my dad.
I just duct taped myself into my costume. I apologize in advance if you find me in a compromised position involving duct tape and underwear when you get home tonight
just walked across campus with a bottle of champagne in between my boobs. night two and the quest for classiness is already over
How many other adults do you think have slept naked under the Winnie the Pooh blanket sober?
I just tinder matched with a blue angels pilot. I need to make out with him. For America.
You know Sunday Funday was a success when 'puke and rally' came at lunchtime on Monday.
Shriek
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