dude i just saw the hottest 13 year old but she was kinda ghetto.
I think my plan to not drink this week was just ruined by my mothers discovery of the chat function on facebook
I'm on page 4.
Im on beer infinity
Circumcision scars are like fingerprints. I think I'm on to something man.
YOU CAN'T BASE A RELATIONSHIP OFF A PENIS
I LIKE HIS TONGUE TOO.
Is this one of those "if you didnt give such good head we couldn't be friends" moments?
Let's get drunk and go to Walmart and just tackle people at random.
THEIR PENISES MATCH. I JUST REALISED THAT. THEY HAVE IDENTICAL DICKS. OH GOD.
he said didn't have much sexual experience and then proceeded to tell me he is going to make me cum harder than my vibrator could
well, that escalated quicky
I thought the Bane mask would really repel dudes but instead I ended up grinding on a frat dude that whispered "bad bitch contest, you in first place" in my ear in a Batman voice
Oh and an honorable mention for your father's porn collection. Things I'll never forget.
I like how you were offering me $50 last night to come home with you to take care of you and your dog
It looks like you got dick slapped by the sandman..
I woke up this morning cradling my vibrator like it was a baby
why is there a dog in my house with your initials shaved in it's fur?
dude, i just woke up in a house i've never seen. i have bigger problems
Randomize
