Just write off about 10000+ brain cells and 6 months of your lifespan.
Sounds like a normal friday night
You rode him down the last flight of stairs like a human sled.
On that note I give you a 10 for sticking the landing and staying on the whole ride.
As I was brushing his cum out of my hair he looks at me and says "it happens to me all the time."
They have a booking log online so i can just check that instead of call
Technology: making bailing your sister out easier since 2008
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
omg i just made best friends with a deer. Im like the drunk santa clause.
You know when you get a stripper pays your bail. You got good wood.
I feel like shit, and I can't get the band aids off my nipples.
Is it festive if I masturbate to Santa porn?
the amount of times i have been intoxicated, barefoot, and in a robe at 3 am at the quick check by your house is impressive, especially since i live an hour away
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I wish I knew the extent of my injuries before I climbed over the fence. Might have avoided the need to purchase a cupholder for my wheelchair.
I put on a tiger onsie to initiate sex... It worked
I'm too high and old for this...
I passed out drunk in her bed. Her boyfriend showed up and told me to go to the other room or we were gonna have a threesome. I threw up off the side of her bed and left. I feel like that was an adequate response.
2 weeks into this dating someone with money thing and I already don't know if I can go back to the being poor life
we thought it would be safer to lock you in the car alone downtown than take you back home to pass out
Randomize