yep. he's not circumcised. how did it take me six months to realize THAT?
I made out with the bride. You tell me how my night was
I can't wait to be a mother. My daughters gonna outdrink every boy in her grade
we need to drink more beer. the fridge wont close.
i jsut feel off the bus, but its ok the driver let me back on. a woman hid her baby from me..
So I totally just remembered that you tried to smoke a hornet out of it's nest.
No, she passed out instead. I have the worst luck, its like Jesus is mad at me for having the same birthday as him
Not only was there cake on the wall but someone shoved cake and meat in a cup and put it in the fridge.
I knew I was rolling hard when I realized I had been rubbing the couch for an hour
She had forties taped to her hands and was trying to give him a hand job while he was passed out, with everyone in the living room.
I CRIED after phone sex. Am I gay?
It was right before we played jenga with champagne glasses for a good half hour
Your rough animalistic sex sounds are disrupting my cocktail hour
I actually haven't slept with anyone in a while. I think my whore phase is just seasonal.
I just saw your mom take a body shot off an undergrad, please tell me you're somewhere near by.
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