Granted, we were all high and wasted, but the fact that she thought we couldn't see her making out with the charles in charge lookalike bc she was holding up a pillow in front of them is a little ridiculous
Did he look more like 80s Charles in Charge or the old one that had that VH1 show? It makes a difference.
I just lost $50 at the races, got drunk, and woke up to my ex-gf. Apparently the good decisions kept on rolling...
he bonged a 1/5 of jack and came back an hour later blacked out with a legitimate chicago firemans helmet
connan obrien reminds me of an asparagus spear
still in the ER. she tried to shotgun a bottle of corona
Just wrestled a cop. He won my shorts. I won my freedom. In fishnets and army boots. still headed to the party. would appreciate pants, but not necessary.
And then he tried to clean the throw up off my pants with 409
well this is gonna sound really bad but we were fooling around on sandra's electrical wheelchair
We woke up in the room with a hamburger patty on the bed side table, one bun across the room, and the other bun under my pillow. Still don't know who ordered room service.
There something about a girl that pirates lemonade off a restaurant fountain as a mixer that I find intriguing.
i put frozen meatballs in my drink thinking they were ice cubes and I'm vegetarian wtf
I just had a visual of u banging and screaming at him at the same time.
I heard Enya coming from steve’s room. I am too high to handle this sudden depth of character
Don't care if they even pay me; I lifeguard for the fringe benefits -- free tourist vagina in the Hilton jacuzzi every single night
andy told me i got kicked out of the bar and was so drunk i forgot and got back in line. the bouncer was zero impressed
Randomize
