OMg patrick swayze is the sexuest man he is killing me I'm gonna get dehydrated if I don't stop looking at him
Nothing is worse than puking naked in front of strangers
I've only been here for an hour and I've already made 6 babies cry.
Happy Birthday
and unfortunately for you, hallmark doesnt make a "sorry i was getting a blowie in the backseat of your car while you were driving, projectiled my jizz onto your hand, and caused you to crash" card
it's ok. he made up for it by standing there and holding my purse while i made out with three guys at the bar. it was a pretty good night.
Will you please bring your dog over today? Apparently I was drunkenly cooking last night. There's food everywhere. I'm too hungover to clean.
Like I had to call my dad because I couldn't manage to unlock the door. And when he got there to open it I was climbing the gate to get in.
I cNt phones. tingles in my fingles. jingles
soon, soon....
I don't believe you anymore. You're like the boy who cried coitus.....
I took your mattress from your bed. Don't ask questions. Love you. See ya later.
She deserves a chance to suck my penis. This is America. Its her God given right.
Should I put the money for my dealer in a Christmas card? You know, make it more frstive?
She doesn't even give a fuck about angle. I seriously gotta start doing like penis yoga or something.
I wasn't going to drink. Then there was alcohol so I gave that up.
I want to meet people. Preferably ones with penises
Randomize
